I get that I'm supposed to be filling this with information of what has transpired over this year, but the dream I had last night takes blog-update priority, because it was bizarre.
For starters, I was eating Home Brand jelly beans (only the pink ones). I then was standing outside in a street (looked London-ish, probably somewhere near the CBD) and my father and two other men were standing there, talking. They had all cheated on their wives (this was not the topic of conversation, I just knew), and it made me really angry.
I then went into a shop - for in dreams you need not make reasonable transitions from place to place, time to time, or from one person's company to the next. The shop I was in was not actually a shop. It had 3 walls (plus the door to the street), a bench in the middle and was really quite dim. The walls were actually all shelves, covered - really covered - with teapots. Similar to this, but the shelves were black and there were more teapots. All of which belonged to my friend, Happi.
I was somehow aware of my brother walking towards a door in one of the corners of this small, rectangular room (yeah, there was suddenly a door), and he had one of the teapots. THE FOOL! To take one of those teapots was so dodgy! He was bound to break it with carelessness and I loved that striped blue teapot, even though it wasn't mine. There was a bit of a struggle where I tried to take it from him, at which point my dad came into the room...shop... place.
Suddenly, Noah (my brother) was no longer there, and the shop had grown darker. Dad and I were hiding in the corner when HELENA BONHAM CARTER comes to the shop entrance, dressed as Bellatrix Lestrange.
She was the devil.
Once again, I just knew. What the devil-bonham-carter wanted from a room full of teapots, I still don't know. She was just mega scary looking. Even worse, right next to me was her staff (which was also Gandalf they Grey's staff - not Gandalf the White's staff). She stalked into the room like a mega creeper and was coming closer. Dad said she was the devil and we had to kill her, using her staff.
At this point, I went to from being really scared to really confused. You would think, right, that destroying devil-bonham-carter with her evil staff features around using some hekkers spell of destruction etc. Oh ho ho ho no. No, the staff apparently had a very pointy bit, and we had to take a turtle egg - yes, a turtle egg - and stab the turtle egg with the staff. Successfully did so, and she did some sort of flip-out-freak-into-craziness-mega-angry death collapse. (Stress not, the turtle survived).
So Mrs.Lovett is outside on some dirty London street, dead and being rained on, when in walks Johnny Depp. He was all, 1920's classy-Englishman looking. He thanked me for killing her, and he kissed me. Twice. I'm not the most likely to swoon over Johnny Depp, but I feel like I am one-up on almost every other female, cause I know what it's like to kiss him. Despite him not actually being present and the actual kiss occurring during some pretty intense Rapid Eye Movement on my part. Still counts.
He then walked out, and I sat down on the bench in the middle of the shop and had a good long yell at my dad for letting the devil-bonham-carter-lovett-lestrange creep into the room of sacred teapots.
Woke up and made myself tea.
I know, right? Amaze.