Thursday, May 28, 2009


Soap. Really ladies and gentlemen, it’s a gift we have been given that nobody appreciates. Of the many things we take for granted, soap is definitely high on the list. For example, how many people (honestly) use soap when washing their hands? Not enough. Really, it’s disgusting how not-enough.

Soap is a simple creation. A mixture of various ingredients to clean our constantly dirty hands. Or just our constantly dirty selves. That’s the beauty of soap, it isn’t just for hands. You can (and I know this will shock you) clean your FEET with soap! Massive whoa! Who would have thought!

It’s simple, and it’s clean. What more could our human selves want?! Why do we have the remote control, so we don’t have to get up! That’s what we call simplicity (no matter how complicated the actual device is). Biodegradable bags are healthy for the environment. That’s not quite the context of ‘clean’ which we are referring to, but soap does a pretty good job anyway. I don’t see why not enough people use it! It’s one of the coolest things we have at our disposal.

What’s also somewhat shocking is that we have had this for centuries now. The first recorded soap like thing was found in Ancient Babylon during a time zone of about 2800 BC. BC PEOPLE! That is a hell of a long time to have soap for. It must have purpose to have lasted this long. I mean how long do you think the hair oil reader of the late 1800’s lasted? Obviously your lack of knowledge that it even exists answers that question. Not very long at all.

Just think. You wake up. Maybe go to the bathroom. Imagine everything that everyone has touched in that bathroom, and whether they have or have not washed their hands before touching. Then you may or may not get breakfast. You have touched stuff that everyone else has touched in the bathroom, and are now about to eat from a spoon which you have touched with those hands. Fair enough, keep eating. You then proceed (provided you’re a school kid) to go to school. If you touch the bus, think of all the people who have, so far, touched the same kinds of things as you, then touched the bus in the same place which you are now touching. You proceed to your regular activities. Pens, pencil cases, desks, chairs, door handles. All with nasty hands. If you are then about to eat a sandwich for lunch, at least take into consideration your journey of the day. Do you REALLY want to eat that sandwich without washing your hands? I mean look at that soap. It’s so pretty. Even says “Lemongrass and lavender scented!” How could you resist!? It’s not going to tax you in any way at all. You get the benefit of clean hands and clean food.

For those of you who are super slack, have you ever heard of Aquium? Dettol? Purell? It’s this novel idea where you just rub a small amount of liquid into your hands and they’re just as clean as if you used soap! Do the world a favour; buy yourself some, and use it. It’s honestly not that bad.

I don’t know if you’ve bothered to read this, or if you left as soon as I reached about the word “Really”. If you HAVE bothered to read this, I thought I should tell you that I’m not a neat freak and I’m not obsessed with being clean. I just don’t think people appreciate soap as much as they used to.
So everyone, go into the bathroom, and wash your hands. Make today your own personal “appreciate-all-soap” day. (non-including TV shows or Movies)

Love you children eh!

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